Sunday, April 02, 2006

"The Lord Thunderin' Jesus Live-Fire Exercises"

Over and over again, I am told that Islam is a religion of compassion - Allah is hailed as the compassionate one. This sounds rather nice. So can somebody please tell me why there exists such an animal as Holy Prophet (PBUH) war games? Because today, during the Holy Prophet war games, Iran let rip what they purport to be the fastest underwater missile ever. I can't deal with the missile question - my head is still stuck on the Holy Prophet war games. Is it just me? Is this sending a mixed message of sorts - or is it sending the wrong message altogether?

I feel equally conflicted when I hear about Black achievement awards. If I were black, I'm not so certain how I would feel being deemed the best in my colour category. It's kind of like winning the swimsuit competition in a beauty contest. It's 2006: I would argue that racially-motivated awards have outlived their purpose, they smack (hard) of tokenism. I certainly wouldn't like there to be a series of achievement awards targeted towards whites - although the National Hockey League awards might come close. For the same reasons, I wouldn't want to see "The Our Lady of the Immaculate Conception Kriegspiel" or "Laughing Buddha Simulated Military Operations". Some things don't (or shouldn't) mix - although a notable exception might be the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. But I digress .... back to the fun in the Gulf:

Some 17,000 combatants have taken part in the wargame, spokesman of the wargame Vice-Rear Admiral Mohammad Ibrahimi Dehghani said on Friday. One unit of Shahab 2 missile is to be launched to resemble peace and friendship among littoral states of the Persian Gulf and Sea of Oman, he said.

Cat in Rabat hits her head repeatedly on her desk in bewilderment. Peace & friendship .... Kapoweeeee!!!

If I were an immortal omniscient being watching over this fucked-up world (and as immortal, unable to take a gun to my head and blow my humungus brains out), I wouldn't want the great unwashed blowing things up (be they fish, other Believers or even infidels) in my name. I would probably consult a lawyer about copyright infringement, or the illegal use of my name (or My Name). Ahh, but you argue, the Prophet is not a god. Like hell he isn't. Can't his name be used for something decidedly more benign - like a spelling bee?

7 Comments:

Anonymous Liosliath said...

It's because Iran is obviously not a secular society - everything is wrapped up around Islam, so of course they'll use their primo warrior, Mohammed (I'm NOT putting the PBUH!) to name their...um, peaceful war games.

It reminds me of the United States and our own stupid code names for missions. "Operation Iraqi Freedom" is my favorite. And even though we claim to be secular, don't forget about the recent (and ridiculous) government sponsored "faith-based inititatives."

Anyway, I don't think anyone is paying attention to what Churchill once said about code names.

"Operations in which large numbers of men may lose their lives ought not to be decided by code-words that imply a boastful and over-confident sentiment, such as "Triumphant," or conversely, which are calculated to invest the plan with an air of despondency, such as "Woebetide" and "Flimsy." They ought not to be names of a frivolous character, such as "Bunnyhug" and "Ballyhoo." They should not be ordinary words often used in other connections, such as "Flood," "Sudden," and "Supreme." Names of living people (ministers or commanders) should be avoided. Intelligent thought will already supply an unlimited number of well-sounding names that do not suggest the character of the operation or disparage it in any way and do not enable some widow or mother to say that her son was killed in an operation called "Bunnyhug" or "Ballyhoo." Proper names are good in this field. The heroes of antiquity, figures from Greek and Roman mythology, the constellations and stars, famous racehorses, names of British and American war heroes, could be used, provided they fall within the rules above."

To the larger question of "Is Islam Peaceful?" Here are two interesting opposing viewpoints.

1

2

10:11 AM  
Blogger knarf said...

For that missile, did they first have to count to three?

"First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the HUMVM (Holy Underwater Missile of High Velocity) in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in thy sight, shall snuff it."

5:26 PM  
Blogger Cat in Rabat ( كات في الرباط) said...

God that movie still makes me laugh out loud!

5:32 PM  
Blogger knarf said...

I liked Castle Anthrax...

5:54 PM  
Blogger knarf said...

By the way, C in R, I really really really like your little whiskers and ears. Did you fashion them yourself, or did you contract out to professionals?

Nice job, whoever did it

6:40 PM  
Blogger Cat in Rabat ( كات في الرباط) said...

I can understand why you thought I contracted them out, because they are so professional looking. Are you sitting down? - I did them MYSELF!! Amazing what you can do with a 'pooter!

2:08 PM  
Blogger knarf said...

GET OUT! (as I push you, Elaine Benis-like)

2:53 PM  

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